Brasier Law

Oregon Family Law Attorney

  • Practice Areas
    • Uncontested Cases
    • Marriage & Divorce
      • Divorce
      • Uncontested Divorce
      • Contested and Uncontested Divorce
      • Modification to Orders
      • Property Distribution
      • Separation and Temporary Orders
      • Spousal Support
      • Support Orders
      • Tax Issues in Divorce
      • Financial Planning During and After Divorce
      • Division of Debt in Divorce
      • Business Division in Divorce
      • High Asset Divorce
      • Enforcement of Court Orders
    • Child Custody & Support
      • Adoption
      • Child Support
      • Move Aways and Out-of-State Custody Enforcement
    • Parental Rights
      • Custody and Parenting Time
      • Father’s Rights and Paternity
      • Grandparent Rights
      • Rights of UnMarried Parents
    • Domestic Violence & Abuse
      • Abusive Restraining Orders and FAPA
      • Domestic Violence
      • Estate Planning
      • False Accusations of Violence
      • Financial Abuse of Elders
      • Physical Abuse of Elders
      • Protective Orders
      • Restraining Orders During Divorce
      • Stalking Orders
  • About
    • Testimonials
    • Attorney Tom Brasier
  • Articles
    • General Family Law Articles
    • Marriage and Divorce
    • Child Custody and Support
    • Parental Rights
    • Domestic Violence and Abuse
    • Uncontested Divorce
  • Contact

Oregon Divorce: What to do When Your Ex Holds Items for Ransom

September 16, 2017 by BrasierLaw

 Oregon divorce, asset divistion of sentimental items when ex is holding items as a bargaining chip.

What to do when the other parent holds items for ransom.

Sometimes in divorces, one parent will take control, by force or deception, of items of importance to the other parent.  For instance, one parent may have the family photos electronically stored on their own computer.  Or maybe they have the only copy of the wedding photos or the children’s first set of clothes.

When that happens, sometimes the parent will be tempted to try to hold the item for ransom.  Maybe proposing that they’ll give it up if the other parent gives them more spousal support or a better parenting plan.  While underhanded, immoral, and rude, this proposal is not illegal.  Don’t fear if this is happening to you though, when going through an Oregon divorce there are options.

What Options Do I Have to Get These Items of Importance to me?

First, people can get away with proposals like this because Oregon law protects “settlement negotiations” as confidential.  That means you can never go to court and tell the judge what the other person proposed during your divorce settlement negotiations.  If the judge could hear this, it certainly wouldn’t endear them to the ransomer, but unfortunately simply telling the judge about it is usually inadmissible.

The best thing to do usually is to ignore their proposals, and just file a temporary motion asking for the judge to order the items to be placed in a safe location, or to be provided outright before the divorce date.  The judge has the authority to order copies to be made, and the other parent can be held in contempt if they refuse to cooperate.

The real problem comes, if they are going to play really dirty pool, and tell the judge the photos were deleted, or their hard drive was wiped.  It can be very expensive and difficult to prove these types of lies.  Most people don’t take their threats this far, as the consequences for getting caught lying to a judge are usually severe.

While it can be frustrating there usually is a way to get these special items over the course of a divorce. You can read more about how sentimental items may be “divided” or shared in our article, Divorce and Dividing Sentimental Items. We also have several articles about other types of asset division you may find interesting, Dividing Assets in an Oregon Divorce is a good one to start with.

 You may also find our article about dealing with a bully during divorce to be helpful.
Clackamas, Oregon Family Law Attorney Tom Brasier
Family law attorney Tom Brasier specializes in divorce, custody, and protective orders and works throughout Oregon and Washington with his law office, Brasier Law, located in Portland, Oregon. This article is not meant to replace the advice of an attorney, please check with your attorney about the specifics of your case. You can reach Tom at 1 (503) 855-4777 or by using the contact page below.

Contact Us

We would love to schdule a free consultation to discuss how we can help you with your family law needs. Our family law attorney will get back to you as soon as possible to discuss your needs. We have offices in Portland and serve Oregon and Washington. Thank you for your interest in our firm. The use of the Internet or this form for communication with the firm or any individual member of the firm does not establish an attorney-client relationship. Confidential or time-sensitive information should not be sent through this form.

Share this:

  • Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Tumblr (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window)
  • More
  • Click to share on Pocket (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Reddit (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on Telegram (Opens in new window)
  • Click to print (Opens in new window)
  • Click to share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window)

General Family Law, Marriage and Divorce Family Law Division of property, Divorce and sentimental items, Divorce settlement, Oregon Divorce, Sentimenal items and divorce, When your ex holds sentimental items for ransom

Contact Us

Latest News

  • 5 Common Misconceptions About Mediation
  • What is Oregon Compensatory Spousal Support and am I Entitled to it?
  • Four Misconceptions About Oregon Divorce
  • How Much Does an Oregon Divorce Cost?
  • Helpful Hints for Getting Divorced During Covid-19

© 2014 by Brasier Law, LLC Disclaimer | Site Map

Copyright © 2025 · Handcrafted by Workshed